respect

Clean Up the Life House

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Starting over… again.  It’s tricky business.

Why? Because you’ve done it before? Yes.  Because you’re sick of having to do it again and again? Yes.  Because you want this to be the last time? Yes again.

So what are the odds this will be the very last time you’ll ever have to start over?  Are you laying any money down to bet on yourself? Odds are that bad, are they? Maybe we can improve those numbers a little bit.  There are no guarantees that you’ll never come back to a place where you’ll need a fresh start or a new beginning, even over the same old issues.  However, you can do something that could whittle the chances of that happening down to a tiny little piece of what it is now.  How?  Clean house.

If you think I’m encouraging you to pull out the vacuum cleaner and break out the maid outfit (please no… there are some things that can’t be unseen), then you are so off base.  I’m not talking about cleaning the house you live in.  I’m talking about your Life House, the “House” that lives in you.

The reason you keep coming back to this place of needing to start over, again, is because of things that exist within you that keep causing you to self-destruct or undermine your success.  There’s a story of a family who came home to find their house flooded.  They began bailing water with everything they could find- buckets, trash cans, tea pots- but the water kept coming.  Finally, grandma slowly walked into the bathroom, and turned off the water to the stopped up bathtub… and the rising water stopped.  Some of you need to turn off the water before you start bailing water.  Before you grit your teeth and dig in to try harder at whatever it is you are working on, you need to deal with the core issue(s).

So how will you clean your Life House?  I don’t know.

What? I told you I don’t have all of the answers.  I can make a few suggestions if you’d like?  You might consider these options:

  • Talk to someone you trust to be honest; ask their opinion on what they think your challenges might be; beyond that, if they are a person of character and wisdom, seek their counsel on how you might clean those issues out of your Life House;
  • Brainstorm a list yourself; hey, you may have more of a handle on this than you know; the giant problem you’ve been dealing with may be staring you in the eye; then take one “giant” at a time, and compile a list of “weapons” you could use to drive the giant out of your Life House.  If one of the giants is “fear of rejection”, then maybe a “weapon” would be to compile a list you can go to of all of the people who don’t reject you, who love you and respect you; use that list of weapons to clean out your Life House;
  • Do an evaluation of several situations, problems or instances related to your “problem/issue”; see if you can chart a time line of step by step decisions that led to each negative circumstance, and when you see a pattern, discover what you might do to correct that next time. You’re the only person who is going to be able to break those patterns and clean those same bad habits out of your Life House.
  • Eliminate the negativity from your Life House, whether it is fighting to invade your work, relationships or your mind. Negativity will stay as long as you allow it, and it must go when you continue to tell it to leave. Negative thoughts and attitudes will undermine and damage your best efforts… but only if you allow it. Clean your Life House from top to bottom of critical self-thinking, destructive comparisons, condemnations from the past and other hurtful attacks on your present.

Starting over, again… I know.  It really does stink.  But you CAN do this. Beyond that, you can do this BETTER.  Life can and will be better.

You know what makes life better?  Pizza.  Let’s talk about that tomorrow.

Eat the Early Bird…

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Eat the Early BirdWhy settle for instant gratification?  Quick little victories may meet a selfish need for immediate results, but is that really what’s best in the long run?

We’ve all heard it said that patience is a virtue.  Virtue, from the Latin “virtus”, meaning “worth”.  It’s hard to wait.  But the best things in the life, the most important and valuable things in this life… they are worth the wait.

Many businesses or organizations are all about making a quick buck or doing whatever it takes to make a sale, regardless of whether or not it’s fair, legal or appropriate.  Just get the worm, and beat everyone else to it.  Don’t be that guy.  Don’t be that bird.

Clients deserve our best.  They deserve to be treated with respect and honor.  Go for the long win by putting out the extra effort to invest and serve well.  It’s harder, yes.  It takes more time, more effort and even more money.  Do it anyway.

In the mean time… scope out the birds so caught up in their early morning, quick fix grabs for success in business and in life.  Be patient and watch.  When the time is right, you’ll be the one sitting down to an awesome dinner.  For the record, birds are much tastier than worms.

 

 

Kooky… Whose fault is it?!

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We’ve all met a mind loser… a nut… short fused, loud mouth, psycho reactionary freak…  

A person that doesn’t really care what’s acceptable social behavior, but instead thinks it’s acceptable to over react to bad stuff in their life.  It doesn’t matter to them if they seem childish, because they don’t think they are being childish.  They couldn’t care less if you or anyone else disapproves of their tantrums or crazy actions… it’s all justifiable in their mind.  Sure, they’re funny to watch, and most people don’t give them any credibility or respect when they act this way.  There bombastic behavior isn’t going to change the situation or those around them.  It’s more likely to make things worse, and leave people thinking the person is a kook.  I think they are a kook.  So what?

  1. I will demand better of myself.  I do this by making myself accountable to people that are trustworthy, and give them permission to reel me in if I start acting or reacting like a jerk;
  2. I will expect the same level of accountability among those I lead, to step up & challenge each other if wackiness begins.  Team members can be honest sounding boards for their peers.
  3. I will hold to this standard for those I lead.  John Maxwell says, “Leadership is influence”, and as a leader I will influence my tribe, my group, my family to rise above craziness.
  4. Finally, I will be brave enough to expect I standard of civilized words and actions out of those I follow.  Just because someone is in a position of leadership doesn’t grant them “Kook Immunity”.

Be better than this guy in the video, no matter what sets you off.

Build better teams by teaching them to challenge each other for the good, to expect greatness not goofiness out of each other.

Challenge the collective by leading from the front, and not promoting stupidity by being passive towards it as the leader. Confront, correct, challenge and move forward.

Live your values, even when it may cost you with your boss, supervisor or owner.  It’s never wrong to ask people to do the right thing, or act the right way.

Near the end of the video, after all of the screaming, poking his butt with the phone, stripping and spending time in the closet, we hear the dad yell from the other room to “SHUT UP!”… and the kookiness stopped…  Is anyone out there brave enough to yell “SHUT UP!” at the kookiness we encounter?

Anybody listening out there?

Anybody every confronted kookiness?  Let me know what happened, and maybe it will help someone else do the same!